The Muscleheaded Blog

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Welcome to the new home of the Muscleheaded Blog.

My name is Chris, and I’m a mature Southern powerlifter who likes to hear himself write.

I’m a veteran of the U.S. Navy, a graduate of Brown Institute, and currently compete in Masters Strongman.

Snarky humor, vintage pinups, and weirdos in the news are just a few of the things I like ……

And I’ve been known to sneak all kinds of things in this here blog.

You really never know what’s gonna be showing up next.

So, my advice would be to subscribe, and try to visit right-regular like.

My blog theme is called ‘Dusk to Dawn’, and it’s kinda appropriate, since I’m usually here in the late evening/early morning EST.

It’s also rather androcentric and iconoclastic— so, if you offend easily, can’t stand sexual references, or if you just hate men, please take a raincheck on the follow, with no hard feelings.

How you read my posts, whether you want to take them at face value, or whether you want to look harder, well, I leave that up to you.

Art, if that’s what it is, always means something different to the viewer than the creator… so, don’t let that worry you none.

If you want to know more about the Muscleheaded Blog,
you can read my post:  ” Just What The Hell Is It All About Anyway?
a random passerby’s opinion: ” The Bastion of Bad Taste ” .

You can also visit my online gym, which features articles about fitness, strength, and gym culture–
at .

Check out this week’s Muscleheaded Blog ‘featured post':
” What Color is Your Rose? ” on most of these fine stations.

I love motorcycles–
my most popular post, on British Motorcycles, is here.

How about a post about travel…
like: ” The Beaches of St. John, USVI

Like Pin Ups?
Check out : ” The Pin Up Art of Gil Elvgren ” –

or– ” The Sensual Art of Raphael Kirchner ” .

( There’s an index on that post that will lead you to a lot of other posts about Pin Up Artists, too. )

……… or check out one of my favorite pin-up posts,
Pinning Down What Makes A Pin Up “.

You can read what I like to call my best general art blogs:
The Art of Maxfield Parrish
The Poster Art of Leonetto Cappiello” .

Or, one of my humor blogs like:
Weirdly Radioactive

If you’re an adult, you might want to read:
How to Throw a Bachelor Party
Wake Up, You’re Dreaming
Give Us a Kiss

I’m thinking one of those posts might let you know what you’re really letting yourself in for.

Hey, like it or lump it …
I never said this blog was for everyone.

Submissions are always welcome-
I’m trying very hard to make this blog interactive, and I love to get mail !
Please send them to .

I sincerely appreciate visitors, and enjoy reading comments to my posts.

So, jump on and hold tight…

The only thing I’ll promise ya is a wild ride.


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The Coolest Vintage Motorcycles of All Time

motI always love to make our Muscleheaded readers happy if I can…

Today, I had a unique opportunity to do that in this post.

And me, too  — ’cause I LOVE to ride, –

You see,

this is a post on four –
(count ‘em- four!)

– gorgeous vintage (old) motorcycles.

One of my readers had sent me an email mentioning a post I did some time ago called “The Best of Vintage British Motorcycles“.

The writer asked if I liked any other kinds of sleds other than Brit ones….

and, further inquired what I thought of German ones, since she was …
… well.., from Germany.

And truthfully, although I’m obviously a huge fan of English and American bikes, my all time favorite bike was made in Germany, in the 1930’s.

Here it is.

Motorcycle of the Week -- 1934 BMW R-7 Concept

It’s called the 1934 BMW R-7.

This one-of-a-kind concept bike was made by BMW in 1933, and designed by the renowned German engineer Alfred Böning.

It’s striking appearance draws from the Art Deco movement, with it’s aero-dynamic wrap-around body,

——– but it’s beauty was much more than skin deep.

It featured a pressed-steel frame, and the first telescopic forks ever featured on a motorcycle.

r7The power plant, based on a 800 cc Boxer engine with hemispherical combustion chambers, made only about 40 horsepower,

….but could reach speeds of almost 100 miles per hour.

An automotive style shifter, controlling a four speed gear box, was mounted under the right handlebar.

The design was so cutting edge, that the bike is still winning awards today…

Perhaps, that’s because until 2005, the bike had been sealed in a container in the BMW warehouse…

It hadn’t been seen by the public since before World War II.

It had been a prototype for a new model, and with all the ‘excitement’ going on in Europe during the time, it was ‘put on ice’ until later.

Like, much later, man.

It’s currently valued at over 1.2 million dollars,
……. and resides at the BMW museum in Munich.

Nice, huh?

It’s a damn shame I won’t get to ride it…

A bike that doesn’t get ridden, especially by ME, isn’t really living up to it’s cosmic potential, but it sure is pretty, anyway.

I’m sure there’s other stuff I could say the same about, now that I think about it.

Next !

My second favorite is kind of singing the same tune as far as aerodynamics is concerned….

But it’s a British design from the late 1950’s.


This motorcycle, called the 1958 Ariel Leader, was a beautifully thought out machine, with wrap around panels that concealed much of the workings, and had an ultra-modern sleekness to it -

The modernity extended even to the finishing touches,

For instance, it came with full advanced instrumentation including a clock, and an integrated windscreen.

Of course,
arielthe wrap around enclosure panels themselves were not new to English motorcycle design-

(and the Germans had pioneered the idea in the R-7 …. )

Vincent’s “Black Prince” had also used a very similar setup.

But, the Ariel promised a sharper, sleeker look, and offered an interesting array of colors, including red or blue offset with gray two tone paint schemes.

This bike might have done well if plans for models with larger displacement engines had come to fruition…

…… as it stood, it won the award for 1959 “Motorcycle of the Year“.

It was a really cool look .

I can’t help but think that a 1000 CC size “Leader” would have taken the American market by storm, if it could have been marketed and engineered properly….

Which brings me,
….. to this bike.


You probably think of Ducati as a manufacturer of exotic Italian racing bikes.

And, despite my pick isn’t a crotch rocket, you’d still be right .

This one, although it doesn’t look like it, I guess, would literally accelerate until the tires came off.

Developed to directly compete with Harley Davidson, especially in the United States market, it never made it into mass production…..

The bike–
the full name of which was the:
1964 Ducati Berliner 1260 Apollofestival

– packed a 76 cubic inch (1250cc) 90 degree V-4 punch—

and it would actually accelerate faster than it’s tires would tolerate…..

Yep… to over 120 mph

…… at a time when motorcycle tires weren’t sturdy enough to take speeds over 90.

Yoooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeee — that’s for me, man.

Only two were made before the whole project went up in black smoke.

( Is that rubber burning, or are you just happy to see me ? )

Now, I know a couple of my fellow 1%ers are responding to my choices so far with some skepticism and probably more than a little profanity about the lack of an American bike on this list.

Hey, so be it, shovel head…. I’m getting there, brother, I’m getting there.

Don’t rush me, s’all.

‘Cause my last choice is sure to make the whole read worth it.

No, it ain’t a 1929 Henderson Streamline K-J or a 1930’s Super-X –
— too hard to keep in tune for an incompetent mechanic like me.

No, it ain’t a 1945 Harley Davidson WLA , although I’d kill for one of them.

No, it ain’t even an Indian,
………… and I’m a huge fan, especially of the Indian Chief.

It’s this bike, right t’yere.


A 1937 Crocker Hemi 91 cubic inch V-Twin

For fifty years, it was the largest displacement motorcycle engine to ever have been produced… up until 1993.

It was available in three colors– blue, red or black.

You did have three choices in trim color too….
…. black,
or ,,,,, ummmm… lessee….
oh, yeah, black.

It was built at 1436 Venice Blvd, in Los Angeles, USA–

… by the Crocker Motorcycle Company, crocker
a year after they started making V-Twins,
and only four years before they went belly up completely.

Their production of motorcycles had, at one time, been third behind Harley Davidson and Indian,

But now, even simple parts for them,
like gas tanks– ($200,000)–
—- are very expensive,
and even harder to get than a date at the V-D clinic.

You don’t see one of these bad boys running on the road very often,
…. and when you do, the waxer that’s riding it has got more money than Elvis.

Which kinda ruins it for me, but still.