The Müscleheaded Blog

photo (1)

Welcome to the new home of the Müscleheaded Blog.

My name is Chris, and I’m a mature, married, Southern power-lifter who likes to hear himself write.

I’m a veteran of the U.S. Navy, a graduate of the Brown Institute, and until recently competed in Masters Strongman, although I still train hard and heavy.

Snarky humor, vintage pinups, and weirdos in the news are just a few of the things I like ……

And I’ve been known to sneak all kinds of things in this here blog.

You really never know what’s gonna be showing up next.

So, my advice would be to subscribe, and try to visit right-regular like.

My blog theme is called ‘Dusk to Dawn’, and it’s kinda appropriate, since I’m usually here in the late evening/early morning EST.

a1It’s also rather androcentric and iconoclastic—

so, if you offend easily, can’t stand sexual references, or if you just hate men,

please take a raincheck on the follow, with no hard feelings.

I don’t consider masculinity a ‘persona’ or a ‘put on’….

— it’s simply how men are, and should be.

If you don’t like the way I express that,
well, that’s tough.
See ya.

How you read my posts, whether you want to take them at face value, or whether you want to look harder, well, I leave that up to you.

Art, if that’s what it is, always means something different to the viewer than the creator… so, don’t let that worry you none.

A lot of the art featured on the Muscleheaded Blog is vintage —

I like to collect postcards and published ephemera from the early 1900’s in particular….

….. and you’ll see a lot of my collection here.

If you want to know more about the Muscleheaded Blog,
you can read my post:  ” Just What The Hell Is It All About Anyway?

You can also visit my online gym, which features articles about fitness, strength, and gym culture–
at http://muscleheadgym.wordpress.com .

I love motorcycles–
my most popular post, on British Motorcycles, is here.

I also like to write about travel…
like: ” The Beaches of St. John, USVI

Do you like vintage pin ups?
Well, we have an awful lot of posts on that subject to choose from,
but you can start here: ” The Pin Up Art of Gil Elvgren ” —

or– ” The Sensual Art of Raphael Kirchner ” .

( There’s an index on that post that will lead you to a lot of other posts about Pin Up Artists, too. )

You can read what I like to call my best general art blogs:
The Art of Maxfield Parrish
or
“The Poster Art of Leonetto Cappiello” .

You could read one of my humor blogs like:
“Weirdly Radioactive “,
Misogyny and You
or
“Advice for the Hopelessly Hopeless“.

Yeah…

I’m thinking one of those posts might let you know what you’re really letting yourself in for.

lossecannonA loose cannon?

Sure.

Hey, like it or lump it …

I never said this blog was for everyone.

Submissions are always welcome-

I’m trying very hard to make this blog interactive,

… and I love to get mail !

Please send them to carolinamuscle@outlook.com .

I sincerely appreciate visitors, and enjoy reading comments to my posts.

So, jump on and hold tight…

The only thing I’ll promise ya is a wild ride.

HOY!

photo (1)

It’s Not About Nipples

isthislegalIt’s amazing —

It’s stupendous —

It’s beyond your
wildest dreams
of what blogging entertainment
can truly be —

You’ll be thrilled,

you’ll be enthralled,

——- you’ll yell
for your money back.

It’s “Journey To The marilyn
Center Of The Mailbag” —

Coming to a
Muscleheaded Blog
near you.

Oh, actually,

it’s already here.

You still got time to grab
some popcorn
and a soda, though.

The snack bar is always open.suspenders

Grab me some Goobers
while you’re over there.

Alrighty —

Everybody comfy ?

My dear readers are
probably the most interesting
people in the world….

And I say that,

not only to kiss your ass,

but also
because it’s true —

Without your flirtation
submissions and comments,

this blog would spin
more outta control
than my head and neck
at Big-Nipple-Con 2017.

Oh,
I’d probably gonna
need a chiropractor
after that.

I dunno what it is
with us guys,
and nipples….

We’re just born haimltoncox
to it, I guess.

But,

our mailbag today
doesn’t really
feature any big nipples,
not real ones anyway.

Sorry.

At least,

I don’t think so…

Lemme feel aroundbuxom
a bit more…

No.

Such a disappointment.

Oh well..

As I was saying
before the whole:

‘nipple bugaboo’,

‘stuff to talk to
my therapist about’

‘thing burst out
of my subconscious
like an exploding
milk carton…. ‘

So,

No nipples.

None.

Hey, a guy’s gotta
exercise some self
control sometimes.

And
listen,
I would very much
appreciate it if you
stopped bringing
them up …..

…. all y’all ever
wanna talk about is
nipples this,
and nipples that.

Oh wait.

That’s me.

Well…

 

Hey,
what’s wrong
with that, anyway?

I mean,
just because
I’m interested
in the subject,
doesn’t mean I’m
totally obsessed by it,
ya know.

I can quit
anytime I want.

Ok–lookie
come on, now, man….

Just do what you
always do
when you’re trying
to get your mind
off something….

Think about baseball.

Yeah…
scoring,
third base,doubleheader
double headers…..

………. that kinda thing.

See how easy that was?

I haven’t thought about nipples in a couple
of nano seconds.

Interesting subject, brief
though.

Did you know that
there are
12 different slang
terms for nipples
that have been used
in popular literature?

lidSure —

there’s :

Blinkers,
Goobers,
Knobs,
Rivets,
Nozzles,
Dumplings,
Nibbles,
Headlights,
Nubbins,
Thermostats,
Ring Dings,
Chi-chi’s,
Bumps,
Nertz,
Dimes,
Pins,
Hi-Ya’s,
Daggers,
Circuit Breakers,
Swellers,
Bullets,
Buttons,
Bingos,
Pimentos,
Raisins,
Throbbers,
Pointers,enjoy
Brailles,
Frails,
Ornaments,
High Beams….

Hmmm….

……….. maybe….
just maybe,
there’s more
than 12.

arthurdepins

Happy Anniversary Muscleheaded

saucyI got my Happy 4th year Anniversary card
from Word Press this month…

Has it really been 4 years
since the Muscleheaded Blog
took the big plunge
off the deck of the
quickly sinking
Titanic-like-vessel
that was the good ship
S.S. Xanga ?

Yow.

Time flies when
you’re having fun, right?driben

Never mind that we’ve
got almost exactly the same amount of subscribers now,
that we had at the beginning —

And never mind that
the writing on this blog
hasn’t exactly improved
over that same course of time.

We still got some great pin-ups —
that’s gotta count for something.

Hey, man ..
what do you want for nothin’ ?

So,
my 4th anniversary, ay?lace

Hmmm…
that means lace.

Wait–
wood is for the 4th, right?

Well, lace on the right person
gives me wood,
so lace’ll work fine.

I just hope Word Press
gets my size right this time.

I kinda figured I’d do a
‘greatest hits’ compilation and all,

But,

I HATE that when I’m waiting for fresh music out of an artist I like,

— and they do nothing but shorten some past hits and reissue them as a new album.

I don’t know how many times Chicago did that — 5 maybe?

Anyhoo,

artfrahmI’m not doing that, today.

I mean, there’s precious little original about this blog to begin with.

Of course,

that means I’ve got to come up with some new content–

— which means I’ve got to shake my lazy muse outta bed,

and see if she can get me started on something.

Ummm….wakeee

Well… ahem.

That lace lingerie is giving me some ideas, it’s true.

It’s not helping me write, though.

But I ask you,

aren’t lace lingeries the greatest invention since burnt toast ?

There’s something patently unfair about a woman wearing a lace lingerie —

A man’s got no defense against it.

Ummm….

Excuse me —
I’ve suddenly got things to do.

HOY!

fr