It’s kinda unusual for me, but when I’m home, I like to play with my dog and watch a little bad television.
I say bad television since that’s obviously the only thing they’re showing these days.
I admit that Gilligans Island was a horrible show, but you did get to leer at Ginger and MaryAnn for about 26 minutes out of every 30…
…. because the TV programs of the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s were, at the very least, more show than commercial, which is certainly not the case today.
I pay $150 a month for cable television, and most of that pays for the privilege to watch commercials?
Truthfully, I’m about to throw the cable box, TV, and all the wires out with the trash.
But I would miss one or two things….
……. like the cooking competitions,
Alton Brown and ” Good Eats ” on Sunday mornings.
Oh, and let’s not forget —
the bad tattoo shows.
I dunno if you’ve ever seen these things, like Bad Ink, or Tattoo Nightmares, but these shows are a real hoot.
…when the 67 year old grandma pulled her pants down in the middle of a Las Vegas bar to show an artist her bad tattoo on the crack of her butt that read ” Insert Coin Here ” ,
I knew that something really weird was going on.
I know this whole tattoo thing is a current cultural bugaboo —
…. one of those things people do to assert their independence,
( and presumably that society’s educational ‘systsem’ )
…. or to make a personal statement of some kind….
I get that.
After all, all my friends got em,
and my son and daughter both have more tats on them than any Salty Sea Dog woulda had 30 years ago.
And I even have one myself…
albeit, one that I got many years ago, while I was in the Navy.
( It’s an eagle.. thanks for asking. )
this is a huge decision that you’ll have to live with the rest of your life,
…. and I dunno if it’s should be made on the basis of five shots of Jagermeister, and a dare, s’all.
I’m happy with mine, because I thought about it, and all the implications, long and hard before I got it.
And the folks on these TV shows, well…… not so much.
Now, if you don’t know anything about tattoos, you might be wondering why a guy or girl with a bad one would be going to a tattoo artist to have it fixed….
Have it lasered off —
( yes, THAT kinda laser ) —
Yowwwweee, you cannot imagine the pain and expense involved here…..
As bad an idea as that might seem, ( and often is, ),
…. the options for a guy with a tramp stamp featuring a teddy bear swallowing a snake, aren’t all that attractive in any case.
… a tramp stamp, in case you’ve never been to a beach, pool, park, or community college, is a tattoo strategically placed above the buttocks to be shown when wearing low riding jeans, or while being ridden like a two dollar mule.
Some common tramp stamps make for interesting reading….
including one I saw with a misspelled version of 1st Corinthians: 13 —-
And witty slogans—
” Rides, 5 Cents Each ” , ” Spread My Wings “, or ” My Name is _______ ” .
The truth is, though….
….. as embarrassing as one of these will eventually ( or should I say, hopefully ) become, the really bad ones aren’t in places so easily covered up like tramp stamps.
Well, ok, you know… easy to cover up in most situations, anyway.
Let’s just take artistic considerations completely out of the equation and look at one of the worst offenders ever ——–
I mean, how do you cover up the word ” J E N I U S ” when it’s tattooed on your forehead ???
In this case, I’m not sure the ‘cover-up’ — the little curvy line on top of the J to try to make it look like a G worked all that well, but……
When it comes to this kinda thing, some questions just beg to be asked.
Like — didn’t anybody in that tattoo shop have spell check on their phone?
Like — just how would anyone be expected to recognize you as a genius based solely on a misspelled tattoo?
Like — considering this one is a mug shot , doesn’t one think about the advisability of avoiding distinguishing marks when taking up a life of crime?
Like — just the WTF was he thinking ?