For Valentines Day

heartI know, I know.

I say it this time every year–

It ain’t all that trendy these days to like Valentines Day,

— but me, I think it’s the best.

And here,

….. you thought I was just one big cynic .

I don’t give a hot damn about all that crap about how it’s only good for greeting card companies and florists………

It’s an old and beautiful holiday about LOVE –aa

—- and that’s somethin’ the world could always use a lot more of.

Man, yeah.

I gotta admit, it’s actually my favorite holiday,

…… and I never even end up getting goodies outta the deal.

Well…. ok…

…….. that might be an overstatement, there.

Goodies of a sort .


Now, buying presents to show somebody how you feel about them are all well and good, I guess…..

crystal-ball-valentineBut, I’m not much of a materialistic person,

and I notice that a lot of folks tend to use stuff as a crutch,

—- so they don’t really have to enunciate how they really feel.

I’m not the most sentimental,

or even literate person on Earth, either,

…… but sorry–

It’s hard to justify why a grown man can’t gather enough gumption to mumble ” I Love You ” to his favorite hottie or two —

—- instead of going to their friendly neighborhood Mercedes-Benz dealer and letting a couple 300SL’s do the talking for him.


Not that a vintage 300SL wouldn’t get MY heart aflutterin’…..

So, maybe I’m wrong after all.

and ,
I said if

You really do need something to say what you wanna say without comin’ out and sayin’ it….. vd

You can’t go wrong with a Valentines Day card.

There’s one that’s right for you —

Whether it’s an antique sentimental one, like this one….

…. that’ll make her see just how sensitive,
altogether sloppy-in-love a guy you really are,


whoopeeOne that expresses your feelings in terms of your very special sense of humor,


even if no one,

including her,

really gets you,

or just how fucking funny you really are,
(most of the time……)


aaOne that expresses how utterly essential,
and visceral
her very presence to your every waking,
and compulsively obsessed moment …..


chowhoundOne that speaks to the things that are really important to a relationship, between two people who care deeply for each other…

like compatibility, companionship,

and one of them people, at least, being a really good cook ……

nonOne that sings just the right note,

of non-committal,

muted tones of emotional turbidity,

saying everything,

while really saying nothing,

and expressing the same,

despite the potential and varying vacissitudes of living Le Vida Loca.

Wooo hooo.

would somebody please tell me just what the hell I was talking about?

Oh yes… V – D .

Valentines Day cards.

(Man, you got a dirty mind, you have. )

wI especially like the older cards….

…. they express an innocence and charm —-

that makes even a big ole dumb muscle head like me a little wistful.

Hey — love is important, ya know.

But I don’t see the point if you never express it.

I know it ain’t easy to say all that mushy stuff….
………. it doesn’t feel natural to a man, somehow,

And it’s just so much less stressful to get her something like candy or flowers, or that expensive, finely crafted piece of automotive flesh.

Pick her out a card, man. aahula

I’m not saying flowers aren’t groovy ,

….if you’re still working out that shyness issue you’ve been dealing with since the third grade.

But it’s really a combination of words and pictures that make V-D cards so effective……

And let’s face it.

If you got any chance at all–

streamlined-valentine— of getting her to re-do that thing you liked so much when y’all were in the in-room hot-tub in Las Vegas ,

well, then,
you’ll get her a card .

A nice one.

If you put it in a envelope with the keys of that vintage 300 SL and place it on the windshield with some flowers and Belgian chockies, well, then, I can absolutely guarantee success.

Maybe some vintage Absinthe would go with it,

You don’t want her thinking you’re cheap, after all.

And, hey– it’d work on me, anyway !

(The RED ONE, please. )


oh, and Happy V D .


check out this gorgeous assortment of vintage Valentines Day cards from the 1920-1950’s at my buddy Jen’s site, here on WordPress —

here’s the link.

There are some really funny and interesting cards here….

Be sure to tell her the Muscleheaded Blog sent ya.

Cheers Y’all.


23 thoughts on “For Valentines Day

  1. another awesome post–thanks!

  2. Jen says:

    Hi there! Thanks for the link and the kind words 🙂

    That hula girl is ADORABLE! SO cute!!! And the second looks a bit like Jean Harlow.

    Got my son a flatulent cupid VD card — with sound effects — (“Love is in the air; try not to be downwind.”) He loved it. So hey, even whoopee cushions have their acceptable time and place. 😉

    Awesome post, Chris — great stuff 😀

  3. ktz2 says:

    cute idea in the picture

  4. augustmacgregor says:

    Wonderful thoughts on spreading the love — be it with cards or whatever. And cards can really help us when we have a hard time finding the words. Or if we want one with a whoopie cushion. Man, seeing a photo of that card on your blog was a new one for me!

  5. Annie B says:


  6. Pimpf says:

    totally agree with you, I don’t follow trends or tendencies anyway, I do as I please, of course this shouldn’t be the only day to celebrate love, but It’s one special day to celebrate so why bother ? and chosing a special card to offer to the person you love is as an important gift as all the rest because you put on paper your feelings and that’s the best gift ( yeah I know a bit old fashioned but don’t care anyway :p )

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