Man of the Future

7Seven years old
was a big birthday for me…..

I got my first ray gun
as a birthday present.

Ray guns were what
the future was gonna
be all about —

At least
to a 7 year old at the time.

You could become
the master of time and space.spa

Any aliens that got out of line
would promptly
change their attitude
and mend their ways —

or else
ZzzzzAaaPPPPPPPPPPPP.

Disintegrated
into little tiny atoms.de

And that went double
for pesky, nosy neighbors
that squealed on me
when I was cutting school,
for that matter.

I did zap my 2nd grade teacher
Sister Francis Xavier
with my new ray gun, sp
I remember…..

(appropriate name she chose…
Xavier was one of the leading lights of the Spanish Inquisition… )

But for zapping her ,
I was heartfully sorry,
although it didn’t
really seem
to do her any harm.teensy

A little singe on her habit
was about all.

And for all I know,
she got that from all the cigarettes
she used to sneak
behind the rectory.

Father McGovern still made me say
10 Our Fathers and 5 Hail Marysspaceonmy hands
as penance, though.

Thinking back,
I guess it was worth it.

Space in general
was very cool to me as a kid.

Everything on TV,
in magazines,
and in school,
told us that
“The New Frontier”
was going to be exciting,
new, high tech,spaces
and of course,
very futuristic.

Although I’m thinking, that,
to the uninitiated, at least,
all that stuff
looks pretty out of date
these days.

Oh —sp1
most of it
they got almost
completely
dead wrong,
sure–

— they pretty much
did a lousy job of
predicting the future, alright.

That’s alright —atomic
I still think all that
space kitsch is groovy.

And I love the innocence
and the adventure of the art
from the time.

The assumptions made about society
and where we’d be in the year
whatever the fuck this year is,fact
especially.

I’m still writing 2015 on my checks,
but I’m pretty sure that’s wrong.

Oh well.

I’m kinda pissed off
they keep changing it every year….

… considering nothing
really important
ever seems to change
for the better, ya know?

I dunno….
It must be us.

Ahem.

moon

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23 thoughts on “Man of the Future

  1. dievca says:

    Oh! I want to be the Zaftig Nude on the Moon! Please, please — pretty please?!?!? I’ll give you my ray gun.

  2. Xtac says:

    I think you might still be able to purchase a ray gun at your local steam punk convention!

  3. Wow! You were so lucky to get a ray gun! And I love that you zapped the Sister! 😀
    When I turned 7 years old, I got a set of western cap guns, holsters, and belt! 🙂
    I love that they moon on the moon! 😀
    HUGS!!! 🙂

    • I loved that ray gun – for all the two days I had it. 😀

      • HA! What happened to it?
        What you said about the Sister smoking made me remember how much my 4th grade teacher smoked. She’d always exit The Teachers Lounge in a HUGE puff of smoke…kinda’ like a witch! Ha! 😀

        • 😀 Hahahahaha — sounds appropriate. 😀

        • Mrs Fever says:

          Oh–! Your comment reminded me: When I was in high school, the teachers had a smoking lounge. My freshman math teacher REEKED of tobacco during class. I had him immediately after lunch and I’m fairly certain he never ate anything for energy. He smoked his calories. AT A SCHOOL. It seems unheard of nowadays.

          Times certainly have changed!

          (Or maybe I’m just showing my age.)

          I now live in an area where the only public smoking allowed is in casinos on reservation land. It’s been that way for nearly a decade. Everywhere else, smokers must stand 25 feet from any entrance. So whenever I travel, it throws me to be offered a choice of Smoking/Non-Smoking sections in restaurants, or rooms in hotels. And it completely blows me away that smoking is still allowed on some foreign airlines.

          • You are so right! Yes, I was so glad when most states became smoke free in most public places! I don’t like breathing smoke! UGH! 😦
            It’s amazing how many teachers and doctors, etc., used to smoke! 😮

  4. Mrs Fever says:

    Marvin the Martian.

    That is all.

  5. ktz2 says:

    oooh I love the ray gun examples, especially the red one, they look like a mix of Deco and steampunk–too cool.
    In the 80s I got one (for me, not a kid) where the trigger pull made sparks inside the translucent case, so no danger–faster trigger, more sparks, it was fun.

  6. julespaige says:

    Not that I’d want to really change much as it sits now so-to-speak.
    But the future just isn’t what all them movies and comics said it’d be 😉

    I still like a good space movie now and then. What was that one where the guy got stranded and ended up growing food in space – I tried to find it on the big ‘G’ but my search words came up empty.

    The gal trying to make her way home (from space) was cool too. Ya gotta have a few brain cells to go up and live in outer space.

    Someone said they are bringing back the old episodes of Lost in Space. I remember loving that when I was a younger person. But I watched a few episodes a few years back and I just had to walk away. The camp and bad dialogue was just too much.

  7. Brett says:

    Nice blast from the past!

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