A Disgruntled Duck

yI was having a very deep conversation
with a friend of mine recently….

— mostly, it was me bitchin
about stuff I couldn’t do
anything about.

She suddenly commented that
sometimes I remind her
of Donald Duck
on one of his temper tantrums.

I took that as a compliment….anything

But, I’m not really sure
she meant it exactly that way.

Still, the concept of being like a
disgruntled duck
struck me as hilarious.

And I became bound and determined
to write something based on the theme.

guess what….

Here it is.

When I went back to college
in my early 40’s, my creative
writing professor bragged
on me to the class one time,
that I could write about ANY subject,
and make it interesting.

I think he was choosing
his words carefully, though.

He didn’t say anything
about it being funny,
or literate,
or intelligent,
or even understandable.

But, as you could probably tell
from the whole “disgruntled duck’ thing —

I tend to take compliments
where/when I find ’em….1a

I’m just not that picky
when it comes to taking ’em
the way I want.

And ducks are naturally funny animals,
don’t you think?

I mean, even though Disney had the rat
long before he had Donald Duck,
Big Don always stole the show.

Basically, because
there’s nothing inherently
funny about rodents.eggs

Anybody who has shared
an apartment with a bunch of ’em knows.

But, ducks are a completely different story.

Just watching them walk is
enough some days for me.

It’s all a matter of design —
ducks are like the AMC Gremlins of the animal kingdom.fightback

Now, I’ll admit
that I have a history with ducks
that I’m not all that proud of.

When I was a kid,
my sister had a pet duck
( imagine that !)
and I’ll admit,
that duck wasn’t exactly fond of me.
( imagine that !)
When I was around,
at least,
he really was a disgruntled duck.face
( imagine that ! )

One day,
as she was paddling around that big barrel
that she used for exercise,
I thought it would be a good idea
to put a running hose in the barrel
to make it a bit more interesting for the duck.

I mean,
it seemed so awfully dull, ya know.

But, anyhoo —
the upshot of this whole episode
was that the duck ended up going
bottoms up.d

Who knew a duck could drown?
( imagine THAT! )

Take it from me –
they can.

that duck, at least,
turned out to be a
completely suck-ass swimmer.

It seemed to me that the irony was similarsandwiches
to an eagle dying from flight ………..

but, the several child psychologists
that my parents made me visit because of it
didn’t really see it that way.

I don’t know
where in the D.S.M. IV that “Duck Killer”
is listed as a psychological ailment,wa
but I’m still no duck-killer.

I was just a stupid kid.

I am a bit disgruntled
about that duck killer label, though,
and I’ve never lived it down in my family.

(and of course,
I really felt pretty bad for the duck)

I’m thinking it all had to do with
just how bad I hated boring cardio,
—- even back then.

Quack —

I mean,
HOY !!!!!!!



6 thoughts on “A Disgruntled Duck

  1. Patrice says:

    I was terrorized by a bandy rooster when I was a kid…
    Can’t say I cried much when the chicken hawk got him.
    it was more of a snicker

  2. Quack, Quack!
    “Wanta buy a duck?”…Ha, THAT duck looks helpful to me! 😀
    HA *snort* on the guy “exposing” himself! 😛
    HUGS!!! 🙂

  3. Yes, Donald really knew how to curse. I always wondered if his nephews grew up just like him.

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