**“Choose love
not in the shallows **

**but in the deep.”**

**“Choose love
not in the shallows **

I always hated math in school.

It’s just one of those subjects

I can’t get my mind around.

Oh sure,

2 + 2 = 4 is okay , I guess….

But when you start

adding letters like A + B

and getting a number

as an answer-

well,

Mister Man…

— you lost me there.

To me,

A + B = AB .

If *that* was right,

why wouldn’t 2 + 2

be equal to 22 ?

Hey,

for all I know about math,

it is, somehow.

How the hell should I know?

But, nobody ever accused me

of being a rocket scientist.

Part of the problem

I always had with

math in school

was that nobody

could explain to me

how a mathematical

process *really* worked

in practical language

that even a cretin like I

(ok -like ‘me’)

could understand.

I mean,

I just couldn’t understand:

WHY you don’t get PIE

with a Pie chart….

or why “PI”

is so much more of an ‘irrational’

than not getting pie with a pie chart…

or why it’s perfectly fine

to have imaginary numbers

in an algebraic equation,

but wrong to have

an imaginary hottie girlfriend

named “Wendy”.

or what difference ‘New Math’

makes over ‘Old Math’,

when I still can’t get the

right answer, anyway.

or why the batch of rubber

I laid in the school parking lot

with my Dad’s 1972 Torino

didn’t count as a “Ford Circle” —

or why any test on “Probability Theory”

always resulted in a 90 percent conjecture

that I was gonna fail it…..

or why the solution

to every “Boolean Function”

proved ‘Evasive’ —

and ended up

making me feel like a Foolean.

or why my Math Teacher

grading on a “Bell Curve”

always landed me

somewhere down near the clapper.

Let’s face it —

you could make

ANYTHING* beyond complicated*

with Mathematics.

Take a simple idea like:

“How do you put

an elephant in a refrigerator?”

And forget the logical stuff

like:

“Why would you WANT

to put an elephant in a refrigerator?”

Because a math whiz

could still give you

a dozen equations for how to do it.

Oh–

you just:

*” Let ϵ>0*

*ϵ>0. Then for all such ϵ*

*ϵ, there exists a δ>0*

*δ>0 such that*

*∣ ∣ ∣ elephant2 n ∣ ∣ ∣ <ϵ*

*|elephant2n|<ϵ for all n>δ*

*n>δ . Therefore
lim n→∞ elephant2 n =0.*

Or:

*“Since 1/2 n <1/n 2*

*1/2n<1/n2 for n≥5 n≥5 , *

*by comparison, we know
that ∑ n≥1 elephant2 n “*

Or:

*” There exists an affine transformation
F:R 3 →R 3 :p ⃗ ↦Ap ⃗ +
q ⃗ F:R3→R3:p→↦Ap→+q→
that will allow the elephant
to be put into the refrigerator.
Just make sure detA≠0 detA≠0
so you can take the elephant back out,
and detA>0 / detA>0
so you don’t end up with a pulpy mess. “*

Ahhh….

So THAT’s how you do it.

It’s now as clear as mud.

I’ll stick to buffalo ….

it’s much simpler.

No wonder

I like history better.

HOY!

**“If you look the right way,**

** you can see that the **

**whole world is a garden.”**

As anybody who’s ever

read the Muscleheaded Blog

knows, I’m no philosopher.

It’s not my

place/role/mission/avocation

to break our existence down

into it’s component parts,

and explain each one

of them in a way

that they can be

clearly understood

and appreciated.

Nope.

And it’s not to

give sage advice

on important matters

of life and love.

Hell,

I wouldn’t take any

of my own advice….

so,

I see no reason

why anybody

else should.

For all I know

this thing of ours

we call life

is nothing but

a colossal circle-jerk

or some kind of

supernal misunderstanding.

What was that question

about the meaning of life?

Ahhh —

well, I dunno,

you might try

the IRS toll free

information line.

And if you call three times

and ask the same question,

I bet you’ll get at least

three different answers

from them, too.

That’s not much

of a ideology

upon which to base

constructive suggestions,

I would think.

Nope.

My job is simply

to laugh at it all.

And I spend a good deal

of time and energy

trying to fulfill my role

in that respect.

I’m not saying

it’s a tough job or anything —

there’s so much

that is genuinely funny,

either on the baser, gut level,

or on a more existential one.

Life isn’t easy —

— and if you can’t laugh at it,

well–

how much harder

does that make it, then?

I say, laugh…

’cause you can bet

that our cosmic

audience is, already.

I mean, sure —

it’s nice to be able to say

that I’m gonna change this,

or I’m gonna do that different —

And on a personal level,

that’s perfectly practical,

and commendable.

But outside of that,

we’re all just

being washed slowly

down the universal river

without a paddle —

— no chance to eddy out on *this* ride.

People, places, and things

are just part of the

scenery sliding past.

So, if you get a chance to laugh

at the occasional squirrel

trying to fuck an oak tree,

my advice is to have at it, man.

— but if you really

want a crack at that

old oak tree, yourself,

well…

… just watch out for

those damned splinters.

HOY !!!!