Slightly On The Inside

A good joke can have
a lotta components to
it, I guess.

I’ve always found
that visual humor
is by far the best,
for me, anyway,
because it gives me
as much time
as I need to get
the joke.

Speed may kill,
but being slow
can be murder
when it comes
to reacting to
a punchline.

Or ,
put another way,
as Stephen Fry
likes to say:

” He who laughs last,
thinks slowest. “

For instance –
let this one sink in:

I’m sure we’ve all
wondered at one time
or another how much
deeper the ocean
would be without
sponges.

No?

Ok,
try to explain the
50-50-90 rule:

” Anytime you have a
50-50 chance of getting
something right, there’s
a 90% probability you’ll
get it wrong. “.

I dunno –
those percentages
may not add up
all that great….

And I hate math.

Try this:

They’ve come up with a
new politically correct
term for dead folks —

“electroencephalo-
graphically challenged”. 

Too cerebral?

On the other hand,
well,
you have different fingers.

Now, if somebody
just threw one of
those at you
without any warning,
you might be caught
gasping for air like
a pirarucu in the deep
end of the wave pool
while you muddled the
whole thing out.

But, visual humor gives
you precious time to
choose just how the
fuck funny you think
something is.

Or is not.

And I always enjoy
sharing these kinds
of things with
our readers,
and
– of course,
reading their
comments about it.

So, don’t be a buzz-kill,
man —

— drop me a line and
tell me what you like !

Remember:
I may have started out
with nothing, but I still
have most of it.

.

!!!!!! HOY !!!!!!

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Would You ?

Wow —

I might be covered
with dust and old
bits of paper …

— and my garage is
about to burst —

but it was sure
worth it, man.

WHAT-CHOO-
TALKIN-BOUT
Willis?

Well, I’ll tell ya. 

Among the treasures
of the local stamp
and postcard show
this year , were a
number of vintage
postcards by a
favorite
artist of mine–

namely,
Albert Peter Carmichael,
a cartoonist for the old
New York World
newspaper back in
the first decades of
the 1900’s.

You’ve probably
already seen a
measure of his
postcard work here
on the Muscleheaded Blog,
although the ones
featured on
today’s post are
a bit different
than those
previously shown.

The series was called:
” Would You ? ”

(and who hasn’t ?)

I like this guy’s sense
of humor a lot –

— he’s draws in his style
exceptionally well,
he’s got a wicked sense of
irony, and he doesn’t mind
getting a little bit risque
with his art.

His characters have
all the usual
human foibles,
likes and dislikes,
and are quite relatable
to modern audiences.

The cards are usually
bright, colorful, funny,
and very readable —

– – despite being
over 100 years old.

I hope I’m
that easy to take
when I’m a hundred, man –

— but I sincerely
doubt it.

Ahem.

His subjects usually
deal with the common
dilemmas of every day
life in that era-

but of course,
there’s also
plenty of
wine,
women,
and song.

So,
who wouldn’t ?
(love that?)

.

They Never Come Back

For today’s post,
we have some more
great vintage cartoon
postcard work by
Peter Albert Carmichael ..

.. a well known illustrator
who got his start at
the age of 17 working
for the ‘New York World’ newspaper in the
early 1900’s .

Not a lot of
reliable biographical
information is really
available on him,
other than he was born
in Albany, New York
around 1890,
and that he died young,
in 1917, after an operation
on his appendix.

A loss of a
very talented
artist, to be sure.

But, you can find a
good deal of his work
posted right here on
the Muscleheaded Blog
( like on this post ) .

So, as I said, today,
we have some examples
of a very popular postcard
series done by Carmichael
in 1910, called :
They Never Come Back “.

The jokes are built around
situations in which the
characters are presented
with both an expectation
to return, and the temptation
to get away, and stay away.

Some are hopelessly dated,
while others seem surprisingly
current —

who hasn’t lent money to somebody knowing full well
you’d never get it back ?

Oh man,
if I had a nickle.

Ethical dilemmas
galore, here, too.

— and the perspective
of the artist,
as far as the ‘right’
or ‘wrong’ decision
is concerned,
is usually
quite hidden —

— he’s not judging,
so much as observing.

Admittedly, this is
one of the charms
of his work.

Another is the
wonderful
light-hearted
naughtiness
implied in
many of them.

And it seems like there’s
a lot of illicit eloping,
evading, escaping,
eluding, exiting,
and general mayhem
in them, too.

In other words,
perfect vintage fun.

Sure, he’s on thin ice
with some of it.

But who can’t relate
to the poor mover
and his aching back
who suddenly
realizes just how much
furniture that woman
really owns.

And as far as
the card shark
who takes his
winnings and runs —

well, I dunno ……

who wouldn’t ?

!!!!!!!! HOY !!!!!!!!!

Musta Been The Wrong Face

usMust have been
the wrong time —

or maybe
the wrong place —

Hey–
can’t anybody
read a road map ?
mild
Those clouds don’t
even look right.

Why does this place
seem so far away
from civilization?

There just can’t really
be a Nowheresville,
can there?

I think we shoulda
taken that right turn
at Kookaburra.

Or was that
Kookamunga?

I dunno….

Where’s Dr. John whenlandsend
you need him, anyway?

Air travel ain’t really
any better, though.

I saw that Reader’s Digest
recently came out with an
article about the 14 things
you shouldn’t do on an
airplane.Image result for funny lost vintage postcard

Well,
let me tell you —

if their list included the
only problem-things people
do on an airplane,
life would be really groovy.

They listed stuff like:

don’t go barefoot on a airplane…

don’t get ice in your drink …

don’t eat pretzels that fall out
of the bag onto the pull-down
lap table …..

and

don’t press the ‘flush’ button
in the air-toilet without madeit
a paper towel on your hand.

Come on.

How about:

don’t bring your 6 year old brat
on a plane until they’ve learned
some basic manners …..

or

don’t try to balance
your drink on the arm rest

or

use some deodorant
before boarding

orgetaround

don’t try to use the person
sitting next you as a
combination pillow
and snot-rag ?

I’m getting to
hate travelling, man.

!!!!! HOY !!!!!!

where

Scottie- Beam Up The Mailbag

Thank you,
thank you,
and
thank you

Hey, man,
my mailbag is
full of great stuff
from our lovely
readers —

(and the really
hot ones, too)

— and I can’t wait
to share some of
what’s in there.

Vintage postcards
are always welcome
here at Muscleheaded
Central, ya know.

HINT.
HINT.

(and we’re taking
suggestions for
the Saturday Car Post —

— if you have a vintage car
you’d like to see featured –
send me a piccie! )

Now, I admit,
today’s general
melange
of miscellany isn’t
really a cohesive
theme….

Our subject matter is so
diverse …

(ok,
so maybe there IS
a theme hidden here
somewhere )

And it only
makes sense
as a post that
doesn’t really
go together does.

But, I love it,
so I don’t care,
and I’m just
‘a grabbin
and ‘a postin.

And I don’t
care
what anybody says….

Hee Haw was a
very funny show.

If you don’t agree,
well, you just
tell Junior all about it-

— call BR5-49.

Oh….

where oh where
are you tonight —

why did you leave me
here all alone —

I searched the world over
and thought
I’d found true love –

you met another and
phhhhttt you was gone.

Gives ya the
goose bumps, don’t it?

!!! HOY !!!!

.