More Secrets of Flowers

You mighta seen yesterday’s
post about the “Secret
Language of Flowers” —
if you didn’t well,
here’s a link to it.

If you did, you’re probably
a lot like me, sayin’ :

” HEY- You cut it off
at the most interestin’
part —
SEX. ” 

I’m on your side –
I really am.

It’s just that I had made
a New Years resolution
to try and balance my
posts out a bit so I wouldn’t
come off like some kinda
over-sexed under-sexed
extra-horny middle-aged

But everything considered,
it hasn’t really worked
all that good I don’t think –
so I don’t know why I bother.

Still, it gives me a
perfect excuse, so
that’s my story and
I’m stickin’ with it.

And I might mention
at this point that all
the pics of flowers
in this post are in
order of mention.

So, #1 is cornflower,
#2 is bluebell, etc, etc.

Anyhoo —
to the matter at hand .
Or wherever.

If that hand thing
happens to be your
idea of a good time,
you might want to
wear a cornflower (1) 

Or just stay home, I dunno.
A hand’s a hand, man.

Did you know that if
you wear a harebell
(bluebell (#2) to a club,
you are telling people
you have ‘submissive’

Well, there you are.

And since one side of
the coin isn’t much good
without the other,
we’ll tell you that a person
wearing a cherry blossom (3)
indicates an inclination
toward ‘dominance’.

And one who likes to
inflict pain might be
wearing a marigold (4).

And one who likes to
receive it might be
wearing stinging nettle. (5)

Sounds like the beginning
of quite a fascinating
party to me.

It’s all hidden inside
the secret language of flowers …

A person who likes to enjoy
affection from several folks
at once might, for instance,
wear a morning glory (6)
like the one shown.

Bright colors are a key usually
to spotting flowers being used
this way —

And as you can see-
being color blind isn’t going
to be exactly helpful here….

but if you learn your blossoms
well enough,
— you’ll get by, I bet.

Especially if,
(I’m hesitant to mention it),
you happen to be into wearing
or folks who wear diapers,
since there’s a flower for you too –
and no color perception needed.

Yes, Baby’s Breath (7) is
actually used for this.

Seems almost logical, huh?
I guess.

And please remember,
you can’t just jump in
and assume that just
because somebody likes
a certain kind of flower,
that there’s an instant
social contract or such –

— man, this ain’t supposed
to be valid in the produce
section of the supermarket.

It’s just for a frame
of reference
in the right circumstances…..

So, don’t blame me if you end
up on the wrong end of a big
stick or other weapon of
individual destruction
wielded by a totally
not-interested party
(Burdock #8)
or a pissed off virgin
(Orange Flower #9).

(of course, they could
just be fakin’ it —
#10 FLAX )

Bird of Paradise (#11) indicates
someone of a more or less
Greek disposition.

And Lily of the Valley (#12)
suggests one likes to watch/or
likes to be watched.

Confused , yet ?

Well, I am.

!!! HOY !!!



Are You Going With Me

now that you
don’t mention it,
it has been kinda
a long time since
we’ve done one of our
‘road-trippin’ posts —

I like doing them
because there’s always
something weird or
wonderful to see
and share –

– things off the beaten path,

– things that aren’t usually
talked about –

– perhaps because they’re
out of fashion,
maybe it’s simply
‘out of sight,
out of mind’.

Still, I find these places
just about everywhere I go.

They’re never too crowded,
and often the directions
are hazy on how to get there,
even from the locals.

But these places serve kinda
like trail markers for those
who pursue that vaunted
‘ road less traveled ‘ .

Highway, schlyway —

Who needs the
Interstate Highway
if you want to really
SEE a place.

Of course, sometimes
the problem is
that the
old road that used
to go there
(where-ever ‘there’ is)
has not only been
replaced, but re-purposed
by those who built
the Interstate –

– like long stretches of what
they formerly called
” Route 66 ” –

but since it’s now a
limited access highway,
it completely bypasses
the place altogether.

In other words,
you can’t get there from here“.

(You used to hear that
phrase a lot here
in North Carolina)

It might take you 50 miles
to the next exit, and an
absolute navigational
nightmare to find it, then–

— but it’s still out there,
just waiting for you
to rediscover it.

And you know damn
well it’s worth it —

No matter how
big or small,
important or trivial,
relatively commonplace
or just plain weird —

— it’s some place where
hardly anybody else
has really seen —

— and you gotta
go see it, man.


Hey …….

—->> LOOK <<—–

Here’s a couple links
to previous ‘road trippin’
posts to get you on track.

What a coincidence !

(and there are more
if you look in my archive… )

Weird Statues




A Mixed Bag

Weirdly Named


!!!!!!! HOY !!!!!!!!!!

It’s Not Just Active – It’s Radioactive

radiumdanceSome of you poor,
long-suffering souls
who have kept up with
the Muscleheaded Blog
over the years–

may, ‘may’ I say-
just barely remember
a post we did on
common but radioactive
household products
from ‘back in the day’ —

( Oh, do I hate that expression —
how do such abominablepostacrd
catchphrases work their
way into our vocabularies,
anyway? )

Well, since then,
we’ve had several of our
fine readers send us stuff
that we missed, forgot, iv
skipped, disregarded
or otherwise ignored
in the first post…..

And we figure,
the least we can do
is rectify the situation.

I guess nobody today nuclearecordduster
really needs an explanation
on exactly WHY this stuff
would be bad for you….

Something to do with reactivity,
alpha and gamma rays, and
scientific sounding stuff like that.
If you’re interested,
there’s a fascinating article
on the ‘Radium Ladies’ here

Remember the glow-in-the-dark
watch dial your grandfather had?

Suffice to say that
painting the radium
onto those watch faces
wasn’t the healthiest way
to make a living.

And using any of the products
on this post probably wasn’t bath
gonna be all that good
for you, either.

Ok, maybe your LP records
won’t get cancer from
using a radioactive record
cleaning brush —
— but you certainly could.

Just imagine the potential damage
caused by the daily use of a
uranium comforter,
reactive chocolate.
barium baths
or radium suppositories.
Or trying to keep your hair
after a couple doses of
radioactive hair-color?

“65 and never a grey hair”.

Yeah, I’d bet.

And all this unhealthy rad
being packaged and
sold in ‘glowing’
descriptive advertising.

so it’s a pun.

What did you expect…



hand handcleaner

salve supp