The Daily Retro: Needs A Blueprint

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They Call Her Lois

I like to check my
‘terms most
commonly searched’
gizmo every once
in a while —

— just to get a feel
for what’s dragging
people onto my site
for a quick visit.

Sometimes the search
terms get pretty funny
and down right weird.

Other times, it seems
like people are just
reading the filthier
part of my own mind.

I like dirty cartoons,
for instance –
hey, who doesn’t, right?

And although I don’t
actually watch the show
on which this particular
cartoon MILF appears,
( too many awkward
anthropomorphic references,
if you get the idea ) –
I am somehow still a fan
of the main
feminine character , Lois.

So, when I noticed
someone searching 
my site for
‘ Lois in Lingerie ‘
pictures, I thought–

” Hey, I’m totally
into that idea” !

Sure, it’s a pretty lame
topic for a sophisticated
post, but as you’ve
probably already figured out,
there’s not much of a
sophisticated vibe anywhere
on Muscleheaded Blog,
so what the hay, right ?

I dunno exactly
what’s so appealing
about the lady,
but apparently,
I’m not the only one
who feels like
she’s kinda hot –

— and it really is nice
not to be a minority
of one ALL the time.

I know some guys
prefer Marge Simpson,
but that blue hair beehive
is a little too weird,
even for me, who revels
in weirdness usually.

And after all,
Lois is a real redhead —
with carpets and
drapes to match.

So I can’t help myself,
sorry.

Now all I have to do
is find some
“Lois In Lingerie”
pics to share —

— it did occur to me
that while I’m looking
for them online, it’s very possible that somebody
else is now gonna be
seeing that search in
their list and it’ll be
my fault.

Ah well,
I’m just fine with it.

And I can’t help
but wonder —

Does a cartoon whip hurt
as bad/good as a real one ?

Just askin’, ya know.

!!! HOY !!!

Troubles and Worry

I like to think
that my philosophy
of life is pretty
simple.

I mean,
I try not
to worry
about stuff
that I can’t do a
damn thing about.

I usually try to ignore
ignorant, crazy
or obnoxious people,
(as much as I can)
and not let
myself get all worked
up when someone
doesn’t see things
exactly my way.

It’s not about
being a Pollyanna ,
either —

It’s much more
about pragmatic-ism.

Cause nobody
gains anything
by arguing with a fool.

And their opinions are
a lot like their rectums —
you really don’t need
anything that comes
out of there, either.

But, I do like to listen
to my friends about
how they approach life —

Whether I can emulate
their approaches, well….

That’s a whole different
kettle of fish, man.

My old Navy buddy
whom I call
The Ole Philosopher,
for instance —

I asked him for a couple
words of wisdom,
and after accumulating
quite a tab at Crabby’s Grill,
he scribbled a couple piecesetchings
of advice about life
on a stained bar napkin.

Let’s see if I can interpret
his scratchy handwriting:

“Life is a personal war,
one that eventually,
we all are going to lose.

If you’re lucky,
you’ll get to dance
on the graves of
your enemies
before you go.

Don’t forget
who you are,

and whose side
you’re on.

Keep marching,
keep your powder dry,
and sleep when you can.

A bottle of cold
French Champagne,
a hot meal,
and a couple of hookers
always helps.

But, don’t make the mistake
of leaving your wallet or keys out.”

” P.S. : I’ll write
more when I’m thirsty again. “

 

Alrighty….

Thanks, buddy.

Well,

…… while I’m sure
that his very short
and rather laconic note
is more in line with the
philosophy of
Charles Bukowski
than with Auguste Comte,

I can always count on the
Ole Philosopher to give it
to me straight.

Sure, ok–

It’s not the kinda thing
I’d want to use as a
quote for the day…..
surity
But, it does seem to
be a perfect
accompaniment
to a couple of these
vintage postcards
and World War II
era ephemera thrown in
for good measure.

So,
win, win, right ?

!!!!!!! HOY !!!!!!!!

You Can’t Really Lick Leather

blondieWhile I was re-reading
another blogger’s post
about comics and
animation’s dramatis
personae running
for president,
(wait, maybe it was mine)
I suddenly was captured
by an urge to do an expose
on the secret sex lives
of cartoon characters.

‘Cause, you know….

If the real-people stars
can’t stay outta trouble —

Just imagine the kinda
kinky secrets those
cartoon guys are keeping.addams

I’m not even gonna
mention the whole
Yogi Bear,
Cindy Bear,
and an under-age and sexually confused Boo-Boo bugaboo —

Hey,
what goes on in Jellystone Park,
STAYS in Jellystone Park,
that’s my rule.

All I can tell you is
that “Mister Ranger Sir”
is more than just a
polite way of addressing that guy.

Caves make great
dungeons, ya know.a2

Sure, I know
there are
lots of people
who seem to think
that there is
too much sex on TV
now…..

But, I think those people
need to realize
an essential truth…
badidea
The terms “Too Much”
and “Sex” never really
go together in one sentence.

Never.

It’s sorta like an
oxymoron, ya know.

Ahem.

Once you start really
thinking about it,
you can’t help but
wonder a few things….. a1a1

— all that travelling around
in a van with two hot chicks, for example…

(yes, of COURSE, Velma is hot.
The quiet, smart chicks are always the most dangerous)

along with two doofy guys
and a very large dog —

chasing ‘ghosts’?

Yeah, right.

You really gotta wonder
what’s going on
with those characters
on Scooby Doo.

But, I guess
we’ll never know
the truth, huh? piggy

Wait.

I wasn’t going to do that post today.

So, the whole Kermit the Frog
and the interspecial-bestiality
thing with Miss Piggy —

— who is looking pretty
stunning in that leather gear….

 

Hey–
who wouldn’t ?

What is it, I wonder —2
that makes it look
so good on a woman?

Don’t get me started on how:
leather is not only
natural,
breathable,
comfortable
supple,
long wearing,
and fits like a
second skin thing —

but also how incredibly sexy
a woman looks wearing it.

Even a cartoon woman.

Lois Griffin knows, man.

Hoo boy, does she.

Again, though,
I’m digressing.

Or am I ?snow

I guess I should figure out, first —

whether I want to post about
sexy cartoon characters wearing leather,

about how sexy a material leather is on an actual woman,

or about some fantasy-based S&M
leather bugaboo that’s gonna need an analyst
to fully help me explain.

Mmmmmmm — leather.

Does that make me a pervert?

(Ok–
no, maybe that doesn’t-
but plenty of other things do.)a1a

Hmmm….
well,

it sure seems like I’m not
the only one who thinks that leather is sexy.

Which either means we as a culture
need to revise our social idea of what is / isn’t deviant,

Or accept the fact that
there’s just a lot of us perverts out there.

bikeEither way,
I’m fine with it, really.

I don’t necessarily see the need for a parade,

or a special national ‘leather-pervert’ day ,

Although it’d be interesting to find out
who ends up riding in the Parade Grand Marshal’s vehicle,

— and what gear they’ll be wearing.

I’m hoping for Betty Boop, personally.

Biker-chicks really know how
to wear leather with style.

Hmmm…
I guess I never did figure out
what else to post about today.

So, I guess
we’re in on this one.

Thanks to my friend Jen way up
nawth of the bunkyline for helpkitty
on several of these great images.

Thanks also to my
Left Coast buddy Katie
for this very funny picture:

Now then….

Betty.
or
Bettie ??

Hmmm….

.

bettie

.

HOY !!!!