Happy National Kissing Day

My friends –
It’s National Kissing Day.

And I can’t think of a
better time to take the
day off, and spend it
snogging with your
favorite person or

Ok ….

if you wanna get
all fancy,
you could

Lock Tongues
Swap Spit
Smear Lipstick
Make Out
Make It To 1st Base

…. etc, etc, etc.

The important thing
is that you celebrate
the holiday properly
and to remember the
importance of :
Safety First “.

For instance, if she’s
got braces, maybe that
deep tongue maneuver
might be practiced on
another occasion …..

If she bites,

Watch out for stray
lipstick stains —

they tend to show up in
places that you’d probably
rather not explain how
they got there……

Remember to moisturize,
cause chapped lips can
make you unpopular —

and bad breath is sure to
put the ky-bosh on just
about any post-graduate
behavior you might have
in mind…….

Breath mint?
Yes, please.

As for that ‘muah’ noise:
the sound of sucking when
kissing is not nearly as
appealing as a neophyte
kisser might at first hope…

And no one ever suggested
that a vacuum cleaner was
something to emulate,
in that regard, anyhow.

‘Random’ kissing is really
not advisable in this
(or any) day and age —
the whole ‘mistletoe’ thing

Besides, it can’t be
used any old
time of the year —

People tend to frown upon
even a little Christmas music
in June-

I shudder to think
how they’d feel
about the injudicious
use of what otherwise
would be considered
a noxious, parasitic

To sum it all up….

perspective mouths for
our special day’s activity
should be clean, attractive,
fresh smelling, and
attached to someone
you like who is as equally
osculatoraly inclined as you.



Now, smooch away
and enjoy your day !


!!! HOY !!!


Arthur Symons says:


” Your kisses, and the way you curl,
Delicious and distracting girl,
Into one’s arms, and round about,
Luxuriously in and out
Twining inextricably, as twine
The clasping tangles of the vine;
Strong to embrace and long to kiss,
And strenuous for the sharper bliss,
Insatiably enamored of
The ultimate ecstasy of love. “

An Anonymous 19th Century Poem


Thou art a flower, dear heart, a fragrant flower
And I, the wandering, hair-clad, amorous bee.
’Mongst all the regal beauties of the bower,
I seek but thee.
I feel the ivory of thy petals fair
Brush lightly on my belly as I woo
And I would sting thee, if I did but dare,
So sweet you are.
I suck the honey from your dewy bowl
And drunken mad, with wild, delirious bliss,
Within your cup, I yield to you my soul
And drink your kiss….