Rubbing It The Right Way

now that
I’ve got your attention.

I’m sorry…
I’ve been feeling
really randy —

Man, you got no idea.

(no knothole is safe right now)

— and I guess I haven’t been
taking it out on the readers
near as much as
I think I should be.a32

maybe that sentence
needs a rewrite.

Or maybe this
whole blog does,
now that I think about it.

So, meh.

As I was saying before
I rudely interupted myself
by giving in, once again,
to my short attention span —

flower— about the only subject
that CAN hold my attention
for any length of time
is our general topic today.

Well, alright….
I guess I should narrow
it down a bit, huh?

I do love vintage
dirty paperback covers —

— the kind that were hidden
behind the counter so
you could see ’em,
but just barely —

if you were an adult –

(which at the time,lovecamp
I certainly was not)

and had some money –

(which at the time,
I certainly did not)

you could just mosey
on back there
real casual like,
and pick up two or three
of these literary gems.

Hey, for 75 cents,
you could get
cheap thrills galore.

Being a visual guyhoyden
that I am, though,
when I was able
to get my greedy
little hands on
one of these things,
I found the fact
that there were
no pictures inside
rather disappointing,
because the cover art
seemed to be making
promises that words,
any words,
but especially the
words found in thesewild
cheap novelettes,
just couldn’t keep.

Talk about
writing bad checks.

I managed to suffer through.

And I can now look back
with semi-fond memories
of hiding these things
and somehow always having
my Mom find em anyway.

Boys will be boys, ya know.

!!!!!! HOY !!!!!!

(for more on this subject,
see my post “Pulp Fantasy
on most of these channels. )


Don’t Call Me Sunshine

a1I see a lot of
the same people
in my day to day life,
especially at the gym.

And so it stands
to reason that
some people feel
familiar enough with
my ugly puss to fla
say hello, even though
they might not
remember my name.

(5 letters are a
lot to remember
for some people,
— I guess)

“Hey man”,
“good morning sir”,
hello there buddy“,
“nice day, huh”, 
hiya big fella
are all on the 1906
approved list of
perfectly good substitutes
as far as I’m concerned.

“Hi Sunshine”
is NOT one of them.

I know I’m angry
from Florida, but NO.

I dunno what
it’s even
supposed to mean-

whether it’s a
sarcastic commentary
of my rather surly
(at times) demeanor,

— or whether I just
appear happily
clueless about
the world to them…..sunshin
(basically, cause
I don’t care about most of it)

— or is it simply
patronizing and
meant to say
that they are so
much fucking
better thanbeet
me in every way.

Either way, it seems
like a pretty passive
aggressive thing to
call somebody.

And when I get aggressive,kick
there’s nothing
passive about me.

Anyhoo, as you can
probably already guess,
I got that one
just this morning,
and it ruined a few peoples’
day, I can tell you.

Cause it flat out
pissed me off, frankly.

Who am I –
Little Miss Muffet ?croc

Oh, you want a
workout, do you?

Ole Missah Sonshane
is heah ta safe da day.

You’re gonna end up hurting
in places you never even
knew you had,poke
and that’s a promise.

Bad attitude ?

Oh sure,
but what else.

Do me a favor, ok?

Don’t ever call
anybody ‘sunshine’.

Nobody really likes it.


!!!!!! HOY !!!!!!!!