The 1964 Ducati Apollo

ducati-apollo

You might consider
yourself an expert vintage motorcycle aficionado,
and still,
you may not
recognize this sled….

………….. if not,
I quite understand.

You see, this Ducati, developed
to directly compete with Harley Davidson,
especially in the United States market,
never made it into mass production.

And you’ll probably just
love the reason why.

This bike– the
full name of Image result for 1964 ducati apollo berliner
which was the
“1964 Ducati Berliner
1260 Apollo
“-
– packed a 76 cubic inch (1250cc)
90 degree V-4 punch—

and it would actually accelerate
faster than it’s tires would tolerate…..

Yep…
to over 120 mph

…… at a time when motorcycle
tires weren’t sturdy enough to
take speeds over 90.

It would literally go
until the wheels fell off.

Two prototypes were manufactured –
– one still survives.

So, if you wanna ride one,
well, you might think
that you’re outta luck.

But I’m told the 2011 Honda
VFR1200 used much of the same
technology, including a powerful
V-4 configuration.

And you can probably find one
of those bikes for about 7 G’s
on Craigslist, sitting under 2
inches of dust in some
yuppie’s garage.

Or, you can go to the Ducati
museum in Kyushu, Japan
where the surviving Apollo is
and beg.

A lot .

apollo_back

Advertisements

My Crazy Heart

1coIn the late 1960’s
songwriter J.D. Souther
penned the lyrics to a song
that I have always related to–

It was called “The Fast One“,

— although I remember
it best as:
“My Crazy Heart”

For some reason,

I’ve always thought of it
as my personal Valentines
Day Theme song —

and,

1amwith V.D. only a couple drips …
eerrr….

I mean….
… only a day away,

I figured
let’s post the lyrics ! ”

Well,
why not,
I ask you ?????

Ok, so,
I’ve added some very,
very cool vintage Valentines
to the mix, too —

I’m figuring these are all pre-1960,
— and some are much older.
1hammer
Actually,

several of the great cards on today’s post were brought to you by:
Jen at Blog It or Lose It

your first stop shop
for all things poetic.

1lawAlso a honorable mention
to my old friend R for
demanding more cards,

— and thus prompting
this somewhat impromptu
post in the first place.

And my friend SC had
also dropped a few of
these in my inbox, too —

but she likes to keep
a low profile, so, ’nuff said.

Alrighty, then —

— music, maestro.

“The Fast One”
words and music by J.D Souther.

a2You don’t know how I feel
You don’t seem to care
If I let you see it through my eyes
You wouldn’t see anyone there

It’s no wonder I been crying
It’s no wonder that I’m blue
My crazy heart was gone and let somebody know
When it’s time for me to go

Tired of being lonely
a3Tired of what you do to me
Hear it raining in my heart

Well I’ve been lonely before
But I’ve been so long without sunlight
I can’t take another day more

No wonder I been crying
It’s no wonder I been blue
My crazy heart can’t tell me why

I can’t tell you goodbye
Oh no, I’m tired of all this tragedy
I’m giving you back your misery

a4You better put on a fast one
I think I’m gonna pull through
You better play another fast one
No matter what you do

Put your money in a fast one
I don’t wanna hear the blues
Put on another fast one
Trying to forget about you

Well it ain’t no wonder I been crying
It’s no wonder I been blue
a6My crazy heart can’t tell me why

I can’t tell you goodbye
Darling I’m tired of being lonely
Tired of what you put me through

Now you better put on a fast one
If you want me to pull through
You better play another fast one
No matter what you do

Put your money in a fast one
I don’t wanna hear the blues
Put on another fast one
Trying to forget about you

.

1satisfyNow,
just in case you don’t recognize those lyrics,

Linda Ronstadt’s terrific version of the song is below.

On a more personal note,

1waI hope all my friends up in the Northeast U.S. are doing fine,

— staying warm and indoors.

It’s been cold here in the South,

but nothing like those guys up there and out west have been dealing with.

Just remember we’re thinking about y’all.

Hoy!

a8

.
.

.

You Got Me Sticky

I don’t drink it
a lot anymore….

but when I was
a kid, boy, did I
have a yen
for soda pop.

I wasn’t allowed to
have it, usually
(it’s ‘bad for your teeth’)
but every once in a while,
we as a family would
get ourselves invited
to my great-uncle Frank’s house –

— and his eleven kids had no
such draconian dental health
decree hanging over them …

so I could practically drown
in the stuff over there –

when my parents weren’t
looking, anyway.

And drink my fill,
I surely did.

So much so, that now,
I barely can tolerate
the stuff.

Maybe the substitution of
HFCS (high fructose corn syrup)
for sugar is part of the problem..

– but truthfully, I just don’t
need all those empty calories,
anyway.

Despite being in the gymImage result for vintage soda poster
five days a week, my weight
has started to challenge me
a bit at my age, and the
trade off between a bottle
of soda pop and an extra
hour of cardio hardly seems
worth it.

(Exception:
if you’re a Southerner,
try to find some
Blenheim Ginger Ale
– the one with the red cap —
— I highly recommend it —
assuming you love
ginger, like I do )

It’s also true that a lot of the
really cool soda brands that
I liked are all gone now…

Hell, as a teenager,
I even liked the
original Fresca.

Remember old Coke in
those 6 ounce bottles ?

Cold as the iceberg that
sank the Titanic .

Ahhh…..
man, that was good.

Yes, you can still get original
Coke in 6 ounce bottles
(with sugar and not HFCS )
— in Mexico.

Interesting.

It tastes like you
remember it, too.

I won’t bother meditating 
on why such a thing
is such a thing.

Just another reason to look
forward to going back to the
Yucatan, s’all.

(Don’t forget the fish tacos
and the pretty señoritas. )

Anybody remember
the old fable about how
you could get a cheap
high off an RC Cola
and aspirin?

Nope.
It doesn’t work.

But the making a rocket out
of a 2 liter bottle of Diet Coke
and Mentos really does —
— stand way back, jack !!!

I hope you don’t mind getting
sticky soda all over everything.

Ah well.
Sticky ain’t always bad, right ?

!! HOY !!

.

Love’s Calling

flirt1920'sFlirting has always
been a part of life.

Even today,
situations sometimes
call for flirting to be
done with a little more
subtlety than others.

But,
our predecessors
had it much,
much
rougher.

Manners were
of the utmost importance
to the people in the American
middle and upper classes
of the late 19th century–

— every aspect of life
was strictly governed by
a set of societal rules,

gThe violation of which,
would subject a person
to social sanctions–

— ranging from a simple ‘hrrrrmph’ or an insult,

to complete isolation from
the community at large.

So many of the rules of
polite society had to doblissful
with the conduct of
unmarried men and women.

Strict adherence to these rules made a person ‘eligible’ for marriage —

Someone who paid little
or not attention to them
was likely to be consideredflirt
immoral, rude, and
a ‘bad’ potential match.

One of the more common conventions
involved a requirement
for single men and women
to be “formally introduced”
before they could interact.

This formal introduction
could only be made by
a friend of the family,
or relative–

A young man would be
vetted by a girl’s father and
mother before they could
even speak to each other
in a social setting.

flirtationcardAs you can imagine,
this made meeting
new people very difficult
for Victorian age singles —

….. but, of course,

as with anything,
there were ways
around it.acq16

The “Acquaintance Card”
was one interesting approach…

— sometimes called a “Flirtation Card”,
“Invitation Card”,
or “Escort Card” —

They were similar in some
respects to the ‘Calling Cards’
of the era,

But, they were usually
written and produced
in a more
witty, florid and
informal style.

Containing bits of poetry,
droll verse,
comic wisdom, etc.,

And, occasionally,
you’ll even see one
with a humorous
double entendrea1
that makes one
wonder about the
propriety of it all ….

Making love hasn’t changed
all that much over the years,
and the parlor was mostly
just a euphemism, after all.

dogandrifleThe cards were used mainly by bachelors to introduce themselves to ladies of interest not of their
previous acquaintance…

–without following
the strict rules governing
such things,

and hopefully —cards

–without violating
or offending
her Victorian-age
sense of etiquette.

Not that her parents
would have approved,
of course,

— but the lady in question’s
response was the one with
which the giver was most concerned —

All issues of formal introduction
for the family’s sake could be
managed once her acquaintance
and acquiescence were acquired.

It was a rather sticky
wicket , though …

retrunThings could get out of hand for either or both party,

in any number of ways —

— since this was obviously a detour around the proper, socially prescribed path.

So, to protect the lady’s reputation,
escortand perhaps the health of the sender,

— the cards were usually handled in a rather clandestine manner —

A card could easily slipped
to the lady in a parcel or
letter, for instance.1

But it wasn’t uncommon
for them to be presented personally,

in an off-hand, casual manner that perhaps
belied the somewhat
more serious interests
that the cards implied.

I think modern collectors
are often charmed by the
innocent humor and
charm of the cards,

….. without spending
a lot of time
thinking about the courting
conventions of the era which
produced them…

harryAnd naturally so,

I guess, since many of them have been lost to history.

These cards were part of that history —

By this very cautious
but lighthearted means,

— many Victorian and Edwardian
age singles became acquainted
and eventually married —

Among other stuff,icu
of course.

Your Great-Great Grandfather
may very well have made a
successful pass at your
Great-Great Grandmother
with one of these cards,
for all we know.

1902

.

HOY !

If Lovin You Is Wrong

(Memo from the
legal beagle office
of the
Muscleheaded Blog)

OFFICAL NOTICE
to all the V-D
haters out there:

While it is technically a
Muscleheaded Felony

to dislike Valentines Day,
and the fines are quite severe,
I have personally consulted
with counsel about your situation,
and we will give you
immunity 
in exchange for having to put up
with at least 3 more VD posts
that are still coming
down the pike on
this here blog.

So,baloney
please try to get in
the spirit of the thing,

as society itself hinges upon your cooperation,
and you’re going to be expected
to both read and comment
upon any and all posts on the subject in future.

Hey-
buck up buttercup.

Thank you.

We now return you
to your regularly scheduled program,

—- now in progress.

 

lildevil

My friends ,

I know I’m probably going to be drivin’
you plum crazy
with Valentines Day
stuff, but I just can’t
help myself, man.

— it’s beyond a doubt
a favorite holiday of mine, and I always
enjoy posting
about what it’s all about.

If I only really knew.

LOVE ?

You can call it love, sure.
fools
Or lust, sure.

Or romance, sure.

Or a combination thereof …
hell, that’s even better.

But, if there’s one holiday
that plum confuses us men
more than any other one,

It’s Valentines Day.

You ladies out there
have it easy on this holiday,
— because you know exactly cuffs
how to make your men happy—

But, we men don’t want
poems or poseys —
(but it does start with a ‘P’… )

(ok–
you can put your head back
in the gutter now, if you want… )

Seriously…..

Just give him something that’s
got anything to do with you naked,

…..and you got the ideal present.

Give him a naughty pic
with a dirty message,
and he’ll lust …

( I mean… ) …selfie
LOVE ya forever.

But for us guys…

that’s another story –

’cause women are complicated creatures….

with complicated wants, needs and desires…

Oh sure, it’s easy enough
to go out and order a
couple of the $59.99 specials
on long stem roses,

……. and the genericok
“Hey- you’re ok with me” Valentines Day cards.

It’s when you’re tempted
to get a little creative
that the trouble starts.

‘Cause there are all kinds of rules
about Valentines Day that no one
has bothered to explain to us…..

and I’m not sure even
WOMEN really understand…….

I’ll give you an example.

vaI have this friend who decided to do something nice for his special lady last Valentines Day…..

now, she was a BIG fan of lovemaking – a BIG FAN – and she was wearing this ole boy out….

(……. and he obviously never read my blog on supplementation for keeping the yang up…)

…… he figured why buy her flowers-
when he could sorta make an ‘investment’ –

he would get her something special,
that might take the ‘heat’ off a little…….

…….. so he went out and spent
about 300 bucks and bought her
this high-tech “love lounger” – – sybian

it’s this thing that has all kinds of attachments and vibrating parts and protruding items of all shapes and sizes…..

ummm hmmm…

well, it’s year later ….

he’s only gotten to see her 6 or 7 times since then,

and she has bought a SECOND ONE of these gizmos in the meantime….

bzzzzzzzzzz………..
bzzzzz……….. bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…………………..

SO-

6footRule Number UNO:

—- whatever you get her , no matter what you do –

don’t make yourself redundant.

Just ask yourself –

is she gonna like the present more than she likes YOU ?

If you insist on buying a sexy present,

I recommend getting something SAFE-

something you can both enjoy –twsiter

maybe a sexy board game……….

hey, what red-blooded American girl doesn’t like a nice and lively game of Twister?

Mmmm….

…………. blue circles .

Okay, maybe a food item.

candyOoooo, I know….

…….. some candy hearts with secret, subliminal messages.

Stuff you might not be able say with words,

……… can still be said with the tongue, ya know.

and, if she has a sweet tooth….

well, ALL THE BETTER!

frenchDecisions, decisions.

Lingerie might be a good bet.

It’s certainly true….

… the old male maxim…

That there’s not a woman in the Universe,

who doesn’t look sexier in her undies…..

……………. but again, it has it’s pitfalls.

Like the man said, don’t free-overtime yourself out of a job.

damianaHmm… ok…

How about some exotic Booze?

You know,

… there are several types of alcoholic concoctions that are thought to
have aphrodisiacal qualities ……

….. like Bois Bande from the Virgin Islands………

(well, they were Virgins once…..)

or Damiana Liqueur from Mexico,

or my favorite …… ABSINTHE. absinthe

This is the stuff all those French artists went ga-ga over at the end of the 19th Century…..

and it’s got quite a reputation……

A good bottle of Absinthe can make all your V-D dreams come true.

Valentines Day, that is.

hey –

they didn’t call that guy Too-Loose Lautrec for nothing…….

(yeah, I know……………..
NEXT ! )

asmWell.
maybe candy IS safer—

Assuming, of course,
that it sends exactly the message that you wish to send—

Mistakes can be more than inconvenient, at times.

Remember,
when it comes to this kinda thing…

It’s very much like Christine McVie sang:
” If we can’t be lovers, then we can’t be friends —
and I got some pretty wicked ways to get my revenge. ”

Words to live by, my friend.

Now, you’re probably just gonna get her a card.

But, you have to be careful about what you say in a Valentines card –
tts
Things can get misconstrued quite quickly,

especially if you don’t know the lady that well,

and you’re trying to rectify that…….

The wrong choice of words,
or an incomplete explanation
can cause all kinds of linguistic and rhetorical difficulties.

See, that brings up another problem….

Valentines Day presents all kinds of temptations
to move a little too fast,
before you know a lot about a person….

Your Valentines Day card could be writing checks
that the rest of you ain’t ready, willing or able to cash……….

renoUnless ,
of course,
you’re just one of those one-stop-shop kinda guys.

And then…..

Well, I know a place
where you can get yourself hitched, inked and blotto
all in one convenient location.

Ahhhh, Reno.

hoosegowAnd you thought
it was only a dump with ten dollar hookers.

Seriously,
you really should think this one completely through.

I mean,
I hate to disappoint you,
but the course of treatment
you’re gonna need after your trip to Reno
is gonna cost you much more than 10 bucks….

Even if you just go for the bad ink,
quickie wedding,
and three day drunk route.

Ya know,
that $59.99 special on roses
is looking like a pretty good deal after all …..

HOY !!!

PS…

Thanks to Jen at Blog It or Lose It
for the 2nd and 3rd images,
and George Petty for this last one.

a1