and welcome, earthling.
when you let people breed
without any consideration
for the IQ of those involved.
I’m not saying dumb people
shouldn’t have sex.
Just not with each other .
…..hired himself to be the
new manager of the Dennys Restaurant
( This guy gives new meaning to “self employed” )
It seems that 52 year old James Summers
walked in there one day in 2014
and told the “old” manager
that he was her replacement.
But when she called the corporate headquarters
to ask the inevitable WTF question—
……. she was told they never heard of the guy.
By then, Summers had cooked up
a burger and fries for himself.
Cops arrived soon after,
and despite his protestations
of a “paperwork goof-up”…….
he was arrested and charged
with all kindsa nice stuff ,
like carrying a concealed weapon ( a stun gun ),
fraud, and drug charges.
His final words on his first and last day as manager???:
“This is why you don’t dine and dash, kiddies!”
born to lead , he was.
I gotta say it now…..
Another man in Madison, Wisconsin —
…… was charged with drug
and weapons charges in January, 2015.
What is interesting, however
— is that this 30 year old
recently changed his name.
It was Jeffrey Drew Wilschke.
………….. it is kinda hard to spell,
So he changed it.
” Beezow Doo-Doo-Zopittybop-Bop-Bop “.
We attempted to interview
Mister Doo-Doo-ZopittyBop-Bop by phone,
Let’s see how far away we can get
from Madison for this next story.
( pleeeeeze )
Warm tropical beaches,
hot Polynesian girls,
poi instead of cheese–
and SPAM in everything….
yeah… that’s far enough.
In Hawaii, two interesting cases were in court
charging that the local Petco store
was taking the customized pet thing a step too far….
The other said that Estelle Green’s puppy
ended up missing half his tail.
Now, I could make an allusion
about the connection of their well-loved Spam
and the aforementioned doggie parts….
” Brace Yerself Maggie!! ”
in a loud, drunken voice.
Thank God he never married.
Erin Go Bragh.
( Ok… I know it aint got nuthin to do
with the dog story, but that one kills me,
……. especially knowing Uncle Tommy. )
Master Flynn Michael is an unhappy Jedi Warrior.
Apparently, in the fall of 2014,
he hosted a gathering of other
Star Wars fans at the Project Parlor Bar
in New York City, where he unveiled his latest treasure:
— a 400 hundred dollar custom-made “Light Saber” —–
until some evil unknown Sith
carried it off while the young
Jedi wasn’t listening to the force.
there’s always some kid
who spoils all the fun, huh?
he offered a $100 reward for it’s return.
We’ll let Flynn explain,
what, at first glance,
seems to be kinda juvenile,
but is really very, very important.
“The New York Jedi are a community
of people and teachers who share
practical Martial Arts-based
and Stage Combat oriented Light Saber techniques
in order to create illuminated stage combat!
But we are not character or cannon specific
to any story franchise. We give you
the exciting option of creating your own hero,
from whatever source inspires you!
We just focus on the whole light saber thing!”
I bet that phony Jedi stuff really
gets the local girls to wanna
take off their clothes, too, huh ?